Letters to My 35 Year Old Self

I think about my future a lot, as every person does. I worry about it, I stress about it, and most importantly, I dream about it.

Well, with life being as crazy as it is at times, I often question, as I did in the last post, what my future will look like. I do not want to know the answer, but I wish I knew if I turned out fine or if life was worth all the worry it is now.

People ask me in interviews, “Where do you see yourself in ten years?” It is an interesting topic to thing about, but what is even more interesting is what will the 35 year old version of me be like? Will I still look and act the same? Will I have it all? Will I have nothing?

Despite these questions, I think one of the most interesting questions to ask is “What would my 35 year old self say to me in present day?” What advice would you have given yourself when you were younger? Would you have told yourself to be more confient? Be more outgoing? Be more cautious? What advice would you have given yourself knowing how you turn out?

Personally, I think the 35 year old version of myself would say to present-day me: don’t worry so much, and relax to enjoy the journey. I think these are the hardest two concepts for me to attempt. As you know, I am a hardcore worrywart! It is engrained in me; I was born this way. I worry about every step I take, every career path I choose. I am afraid to make a mistake, and because I am like that… (That leads me to point Number 2. )

…I need to enjoy the journey. Because I do worry so much, and I plan the future way further than I have control, I cannot enjoy the moment. I need to embrace my youth and have the time of my life. I need to let go and just be present.

Of course that is much easier said than done. Fortunately, these are the two concepts I am learning through my boyfriend. He has been telling me to relax and stop worrying since I met him. We are opposites in many ways, but this is how an opposite becomes a strength. He has shown me how to chill and enjoy each day as if it were our last. Who knows what the future holds, so how can we plan for it? As far as making a mistake goes, he repeats his newly adopted life motto: there is no right or wrong. Just A or B.

This new perspective does holds a lot of insight. I think if I can see the world through those lenses, maybe I will be able to strengthen my greatest weaknesses – patience and remaining calm.

Think about it…What would your 10 year old, older self say to you in present day? OR, what would your current self say to your future-self 10 years from now?

Dear 35-Year-Old Ashley,

I hope that when I meet you, I am able to look back upon my youth and be proud of how I survived, and hopefully be surrounded by great accomplishments and stories to share with you. I hope to be a happy and strong woman. I may not be near any version of you yet, but I hope to make you proud. I hope we turn out alright.

Until then… see you in 10 years.

PS. Any tips on how to stop worrying?