Tuesday, October 4, 2011

Late Life Bloomer

Looking at my life, I guess like many people my age, I say how I am not as far as I would like to be in life. I thought that by the time I was 24, I would have completed two years of working experience, finished my first job and looking for a promotion, I would be living abroad studying for my business degree in London, and hopefully in a serious relationship and traveling the world/Europe.

Well, as you know, none of those hopes and dreams for myself have come true. I am not sad, but I am disappointed. Many say it's the economy, it's the job market, it's school competition or whatever. Say what you want of it, but I have just come to realize that it may be some or all of that, but in the midst of trying to put the blame somewhere, I have discovered that I am a late bloomer in life. I just need to accept that.

Think about it. First, the job. 2.5 years out of school, I am now just starting my first job. I have two years of work experience, but not consistent enough to get me a job promotion. I just landed my first real job - entry level job. Don't get me wrong, this is not a bad thing. It was just the cards I have been dealt. I was not meant to get a job with the economy until now. As I look at Facebook and LinkedIn, I see there are several high school and college classmates that are now into their second or third jobs. Some have gotten great promotions and are making good money. Me... I just started. I feel somewhat behind I guess, but that is just what I was meant to be.

Second, apartment living... Many of my close friends as well as family members are more settled than I am. For example, my brother has had his own apartment fully furnished and decorated for over a year. As for me? I do not own a single piece of furniture. I don't even own the pillows that I sleep on. I am 24 years old, and at my age, my parents were already married and moved into their own apartment. I am no where near that stage in my life. Most of my friends who are living in other cities have their places/apartments, and some are now getting married and moving into a nice house. I just look forward to the day that I decorate my own room and have a place to call mine. I cannot wait!! But for now, I am still living in someone's place... a late bloomer for settling into my own space

Boys, Relationships & Marriage- Being that I am 24, I know I should not be really looking into getting married right now, but enjoying life as it comes. Well this is much easier said than done. At this stage in my life, I thought I would be in a serious relationship that was possibly close to engagement or at least heading there. I am no where near there.

I am just a late bloomer with any boy experience. In high school, I never dated. I had a few crushes, sure, but they went rejected and unnoticed. I couldn't get any boy's attention. Maybe it was because I was super busy, they were immature, or whatever, but it just didn't happen. I didn't have a boy friend in college either, and I didn't have my first kiss until I was 21 just because I gave up on the idea of making it special and was just curious about that part of life. Boys were just never a part of my life that I have experienced.

So coming back to relationships, I am also realize a late bloomer for this too. When majority of my high school friends have been in a 2-3 year relationship or are close to engagement, I have just had my first relationship of 8 months. He and I broke up for various reasons in August, and it was really hard for me. Guess I am also a late bloomer when dealing with your first heart-break. Go figure. My point was that at an age when my parents were already married, I am just entering the world of dating.

Anyway, I just wanted to highlight some of the ways I feel like I am either behind or just starting to come into my own. I am not trying to compare my life to anyone else's because I love my life. It is just I cannot help but to feel behind in several ways in terms of where society expects you to be, where I expected myself to be, and where I hope to be. I know my time is slowly coming just because I am starting to be able to settle now that I have the job. It just took two years to get there.

So to all my fellow late bloomers, don't rush life. I am trying not to sprint through it as I had been. Take the fact that in time you will become your own person with pride. It is something I am working on, and I am growing at my own pace. For that I am proud of myself.

1 comment:

  1. Fine words, Ms. R! If it's any consolation, I'm pushing twenty-seven, have yet to have my first job, and am vividly jealous of yours. Like, my jealousy may ruin our friendship, it's so serious.

    Also, I'm so sorry to hear you broke up. That's such a rough thing to deal with...you have my every sympathy.

    Keep trucking, m'dear. I'm doing my best to return shortly so that we can eat wonderful things and see lousy movies together.

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