Goodbye Orlando, Hello LA, See you Tomorrow, Conan!

Hey Bloggers!

I am typing this entry on my flight as I head to Phoenix and leaving Orlando. : ( It is amazing how quickly time flies when it is the least convenient to you. I cannot believe 8 days have passed already. It seems I just got here. Oh well, I know I will back soon, not sure when, but it will happen.

Looking back over the week, it went really well. It was much for chill and relaxing than I had anticipated, but it also definitely had its stresses at some points. One stress point was finding all my rides to and from places. Thank you to those who helped! I really appreciate it. I only got stranded once, and I will go into that in a moment.

I had some great homemade meals, living room entertainment, and a nice night at Food and Wine that ended with sitting in the show booth at the American Pavilion to watch a concert from Starship. I also worked out and did some back exercise every day, (although my back has been acting up this trip a bit), as well as visited some old friends at the Great Movie Ride.

There were some things that did not get accomplished such as: Harry Potter World, Main Street Electrical Parade, TANGLED characters, Cowboys bar, and a Halloween party, but I still had a great trip. I will do all those next time.

My meetings with the executives did go well overall, and all three have offered the upmost support to help me get to where I want to be with the company. I was not expecting that type of reception. Was it because Orlandians are generally nicer, or is it due to being at WDW, or have I just gotten used to the demeanor of those in LA? Either way, they were all really kind to me. I am truly thankful for the chance to meeting with them all.

One of the biggest stressors was the day I had two meet and greets within two hours of each other, and my plan on how to get there fell through completely, and I was basically stranded for a bit. I had a rental car reservation that fell through and I could not get a car within 45 minutes, nor would the companies pick me up off of Disney Resort Property. I called a taxi, but had to stop at an ATM for cash to pay him. What I thought would be a quick ride, was a long ride and ended up costing me all my cash. I could not afford a way back to the next M&G unless it was free (HA!)

My meeting was all the way behind Magic Kingdom in the middle of nowhere because this location was meant to be hard to find. I had to walk around a security gate, which I got interrogated by an officer after I broke the security policy, and I had no car. I couldn’t afford a cab, and I had no time with Disney Transportation; plus, I would have to make my way backstage, and I did not know where I was going. Luckily, a good friend of mine came to my rescue. I could not have been more grateful! Oh, and btw, it was about 100 degrees at this time.

The weather tied the record for hottest days ever everyday this week, including this one. It was soooo hot this week! I cannot believe it is Oct/almost Nov. It was definitely June/July weather.

Anyway, I made it through the week, but one shift short of seasonal. I had two shift exchanges that were denied, so I hope to talk to manager to let it slide and keep my status. I would suck if all this effort was for nothing. I hope to stay seasonal, especially since it seems I will be leaving the Studios in Burbank for some time.

That brings me to Conan. I cannot believe I start tomorrow! YAYAYA! I really hope this is a beginning of a great opportunity and the beginning of a new career path. I am really nervous and excited all at the same time, even if it is for an internship. I know I am going to be thrown right in it, so I hope I will do well. I feel like this is the right move for me, and that feels great to say.

The only challenge is to find a job to sustain me the rest of my time. I will work M-Th, so I need a small job to work nights and weekends to survive. That is my goal for this week. Hopefully it will be successful. I just need to survive for a few months. SURVIVE! I also hope the jet lag won’t bother me. It usually sucks flying East to West for me, and it takes me most of the week to adjust to the time. I know I will be tired tonight, and I have a big day tomorrow to prepare for.

I will let you know how it all goes! Hopefully this is the beginning of a new chapter! However, if I did not have Conan to return too tomorrow, I think I would have stayed in Orlando a few more days. I just can’t let it go, although I noticed how bored I got this trip. I forget that the night life is not as good as LA, so for that, and I cannot believe I am admitting this, I miss LA.

Someone asked me this trip if I am happy. I haven’t thought of it like that in a while. I said, “I am becoming content.” I realize now, I have made friends, I have connections, and I have a direction, the only thing I need is a job. I need the thing I came out here for to really seal the deal I think. Then I will be happier. Maybe not Happy, but HappIER.

Okay, well, I am going to try and sleep, but doubtful. Thanks to my friends who helped me out this week!! I know this was the last week of relaxing for quite a while since I will buckle down and focus for the next few months. I had such a good week, and I hate to be leaving, but life has me going in another direction. So until next time…Goodbye Orlando, Goodbye Employment Boredom, Hello LA, and See you tomorrow, Conan!

Can you Outgrow Your Dreams?

(Monday 913- Sunday 9/19)

I do not want this post to sound sad or depressing, but this has been a thought on my mind for quite some time. I guess with the natural string of events the last few weeks of not getting into the Studios as I wanted and adjusting to my new routine of not going to the office for the first time in six months, it makes me wonder about a lot of issues.

About two or three posts ago, I wrote a question and said it would be a new post. This is it. The question I wrote was: Is what I wanted still what I want? This is such a key question in my thought process and it does make me wonder. Do we ever outgrow our dreams?

I would like to say the answer is "no" to the later, but I would like to sit on this for a minute. When I was a kid, all I wanted to do was be a doctor. In high school, I became an EMT for five years, and I realized as much as I love anatomy, psychology and medicine, it was not what I was passionate about. I could be good at it, but not great. My next passion was entertainment. I pursued it in college and I fell in love with it. I felt right at home in the studio sets and new I had an act for it. What I am getting to is... I did not outgrow my doctor dream, I just matured from it and chose a different path.

In terms of me working for Disney, this is where it gets tricky. I have loved Disney since childhood, and have not had a passion working for any other company since. It has always been my goal to get to Burbank and work for the Studios. With a lot of work and opportunity, I was able to do so over the last 6 months, but it has still been an up and down roller coaster. I have realized working at the Studios is not all I thought it could be. I loved working in Production, but I felt my talents were not being used. I have been told by HR in order to work for the studios, I need to leave Disney, get experience and come back. I tend to do that, but I almost feel like I am betraying the company by looking elsewhere.

Should I consider working in another department of the company just because it is Disney even though it may not be what I ultimately want to do, or, do I go after what I want with another company and return? Still playing with this question.

Anyway, I feel like I accomplished some of my dreams within the last few months. I worked at the studios. I accomplished working in Production, and I accomplished getting to my #1 Hollywood goal: the Pirates set. Now what? Have I outgrown my dream of working at the Studios since I see little opportunity of getting in? Or do I still see that as the end goal, but I need to find another way around it to get in?

I also have noticed a change in what I ultimately want to do. I first came out here in hopes to become a Studio Executive for Disney. No ifs, ands or buts about it. Now... I am more confused about my direction, but I am itching to get back into live television. I see my self becoming an executive producer for a show or sitcom that is owned by Disney, either on ABC for shows like GMA, Regis and Kelly, etc, or even on Disney Channel. I love the new show, "Good Luck Charlie", because it contains all the elements I love: family, disney, humor, live audience, etc.

I guess to sum all things up... no we do not outgrow our dreams. I think they just evolve over time. Although my goal of being a Studio exec has changed, my current executive producer dream still upholds the same characteristics.

What do you think? Is it possible to outgrow your ultimate dream? Sure, over time we tend to realize we won't become our childhood dream of a firefighter, a ballerina, or a doctor, but I do not think we abandon our dreams all together. Heck, I am working for the company of dreams, and I believe fully in the power of going after what you want. The idea of outgrowing our dreams was a new thought to me, and because I am afraid of growing up, I know I will never let go of mine; they will just evolve with me.

Mind My Worst Enemy

Usually, I am a pretty good sleeper. I go to bed and tend to pass out within a few minutes and sleep without waking up. I love to get about 8-9 hours of sleep a day, but lately, my mind has become my worst enemy.

It seems my brain doesn't get the memo that night time is when you are supposed to calm down. Instead, my mind seems to race once the lights turn off. It is quite annoying actually. I guess instead of dreaming, I end up day dreaming... at night... quite intensely. I don't mean too, it just happens.

This isn't anything new either. It really started back about a month and a half ago, when I was really starting to get stressed about life and its direction. I would think about everything and anything. Then it really sped up once I bought my ticket in February to move to LA. I would start thinking about where I would live, who I would stay with and then the future of my apartment.

That sounds all healthy and good, but I can get carried away, like excessively.

For example, about my future apartment, I start thinking about the wall colors, the cover rug and the plates. I want a queen size bed for the first time with the comforter from the Sheraton Inn with a few pillows to make it fluffy and soft. Soft enough for a cat to sleep on. So now, I want a cat! What kind? I was thinking a handicapped tabby of some sort calling it Angel. I want it to be near me because I miss my cats so much at home. Oh back to the rug. I was thinking the purple one from PB Teen with the white polka dots. That would cover enough floor space to make it feel like I have a carpet.

Oh, I have some pots and things my grandmother gave me in boxes since she moved from her condo. Those would be great to use. But how am I going to get those shipped out west without breaking them, since they are all ceramic? I could pay for shipping, or maybe my brother would want to do a road trip this summer, but with what car? Our van is breaking, I have the other, my mom needs the Murano to drive our sister, and Dad has a company car. Ooooo.... cars, I want to buy a new car someday. What to get? I really want the ice blue color on a small car. It should also have a sun roof and non leather seats. I like carpeted seats. Speaking of carpet, I really want that PB Teen rug! I also want the mattress that James has because you feel like you are floating on a cloud! I need to look into that. I wonder what it is like to float in a cloud? I should go sky diving! That way I can figure it out and accomplish a life goal! Oh, I have to finish that life goal project.....

ANYWAY, you see how it keeps going? There is no stop! Sometimes it keeps me up for around 3 hours. That is the downside.

I know I am a big worrier as it is, but this doesn't help. Where is my off switch? I guess it is a good thing to be aware of what is going on, and to have a plan, but it's crazy! I should do that during daylight hours. I keep a notepad by my bed just in case I remember something I need to do or look up in the morning.

Lately though, it has gotten better. I made the move to Cali, so that got rid of some worry. However, now I am always thinking about work, a future job, and what my apt will look like. Also, I have been thinking about the roommate possibilities, how I still need to make it to Savannah for my borther's college graduation, NJ for my sister's high school graduation, and about my friends in FL and how I can remain seasonal at WDW. I hope I can remain seasonal there, because it is important to me.

So you see, my mind is always going. I remember a friend of mine told me I need to take an actual "chill pill" and there is medicine for that. Anyway, does anyone else have this problem? My mind is my own worst enemy. I just need to find the off switch.

Okay, this post took a lot of energy. I need to go take a nap.... if my mind will let me.